I made a delicious dinner tonight! Stuffed pasta shells with a homemade tomato sauce.
I felt like I was eating a tasty meal at one of my favorite italian places in my home town, except instead of the constant smell of garlic, fancy black tie waiters, and 1950s italian music, my atmosphere was a messy apartment with my spotify playlist. With that being said, Today, I am thankful for cooking blogs. Upon many of my pinterest binges, I always stumble upon blogs that include recipes of sorts for whatever my hearts desire. Some things I've made via cooking blogs have turned out great, like my dinner tonight, while other things...not so much, such as zucchini fritters (long story). Anywho, I am thankful for cooking blogs for a few reasons. 1. They help me cook better. I''ve gotten ALOT better in the last four years, but cooking has has become alot easier since cooking blogs because of pictures and comments people leave on blogs including tips and substitutions. 2. They make me try new things Good or bad, I enjoy the adventure and excitement of changing up meals from the same old round. 3. They expand my spice collection I can't tell you how many new spices and herbs I have become aware of via cooking blogs and recipes calling for off the wall spices. I have started searching for spices sometimes just to find other ways to use them... So, thank you to those out there who can cook and help struggling easy bake oven generation kids like me cook properly.
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It's been a long time since I've done any post and boy, do I have ALOT to tell. . . .
And in time, that will come. But as for now, Today, I am thankful for getting back. For getting back into the swing of things, back to sanity, back to my relationship with God. I have so many things to be thankful for and this is just the beginning. Be on the look out for more regular post again as before! Feels great to be writing again :] "Therefore if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any common sharing in the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, 2 then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind. 3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit.Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, 4 not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.
5 In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus: 6 Who, being in very nature[a] God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage; 7 rather, he made himself nothing by taking the very nature[b] of a servant, being made in human likeness. 8 And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death-- even death on a cross! 9 Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, 10 that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, 11 and every tongue acknowledge that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God our father. Today, I am thankful for hearing aids. Nursing becomes pretty tough when a patient isn't wearing their hearing aids. "HELLO! MY NAME IS HOPE AND IM GOING TO BE ONE OF YOUR NURSES TODAY!" "What? Who are you?" "MY NAME IS HOPE." "Hope?" "YES. THAT IS ME." "Oh no, she died in 2001. Best shrimp I ever had at a funeral." You can only imagine how 3 hours like that could be. Luckily, a family member finally brought those beautiful hearing aids. And all was well in the world again! Today, I am thankful for a good cry. All the built up stress and worry and anxiety I hoard is a heavy burden I carry. It sits there on my back, collecting more weight and power as I continue to think and struggle with the stresses in life. Like a pressure cooker, the more pressure that builds, the louder the scream gets and the more dangerous the pot becomes. I am like a pressure cooker when I'm under stress: everything builds until either I bust or I'm taken off the burner. Crying is one way I take myself off the burner. I don't like crying... My nose starts to run, my contacts get blurry, and my throat becomes really sore. And I feel so vulnerable when I cry. But crying can be the only way to release. Release of pressure, stress, anxiety, worry, doubt, anger. You name it. Releasing all those tears symbolically can be like releasing the built up heavy burdens you've been collecting for so long. The problem or area of stress may still be present but sometimes crying can clear away the stress and fog and give you that clarity you've been seeking. “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” -Matthew 11:28-30 I realize fully that I missed 3/10 post. . . . I have just been so busy and exhausted, it completely slipped my mind. This has been one of the hardest couple of weeks I've been through and it won't end until I pass this one final test.
Anyways, I have to say this post and next couple for awhile (If I can remember and I'm not completely exhausted) will be short: Today, I am thankful for simple request. After a completely busy and grueling day working, sometimes its hard to find something positive while amongst chaos. But within that chaos, I found joy in a call light from one room. Trying his hardest not to ever have to use the call light, this patient sometimes needed assistance, but every thing he asked was such a simple request. "Can you please open this bag of chips?" "I don't mean to bother but would you do me the favor of getting me tissues?" "Why hello Hope! I was just wanting to make sure I could order dinner." Always so happy and content, never wanting to upset the staff or be a burden, this patient always had the simplest task or questions or favors. Going from walking into a room where an IV pump was beeping, the patient was vomiting, and the family was asking a million questions to a room where all I had to do was open a bag of chips was literally the highlight of my day. It is not always the grand gestures or big life changing moments that hit us the most. Sometimes its small, little things that occur over a 12 hour shift, a couple weeks, or even a life time that mean the most and make you smile and remember life works out in all the chaos. This past weekend was a whirlwind. I apologize for some of the recent post. They have not been up to my standards and I have a feeling these next two and a half weeks won't be any better. Life is becoming more filled with adulthood and the harsh reality of almost being done with college is starting to shine its bright lights. I've dreamed and planned about this time for so long, and now its coming to pass.
And with that time, this past weekend was my last spring sing. For four years, I was apart of this huge production that caused so much happiness, sadness, joy and bitterness all in one show. This all consuming show will be one of the things I remember most about being at OC. Along with those memories comes many other memories, including who was there. It was very important growing up that my parents attend all of my performances whether that was for colorguard, chorus, theater, or whatever else. I always saw my mom's smiling face and my dad's waving hand. I never asked them to attend everything, but they did anyways. It didn't occur to me how important that was until my freshman year. They do this show every year that is done just by the freshmen that is kinda like spring sing but no where near the same amount of time or energy is put into this show. Anyways, I did the show my freshman year, and I didn't think it was that big of a deal so I told my parents they didn't have to come. But, after the first show friday night, it hit me how much I missed seeing my parents in the audience. I had no one there. No smiles. No waves. The audience was just empty to me. So I made the call. The "I miss my parents in the audience call". I didn't expect any results. Just a simple, "I'm sorry sweetie, we'll make sure to come to the next show you do." But instead I got an email for a plane that arrived the next morning in Oklahoma City. My mom ended up coming to see my second performance that saturday afternoon. Today, I am thankful for faces in the crowd. Ever since then, my mom has attended all of my spring sing shows, sitting through more then one show. I have also had many other family such as my dad, grandparents, and nana come to see me for some of my shows through college. And even this year, when my part in spring sing was very small and spring sing no longer mattered to me as before, it mattered so much to have my mom sitting in the crowd, with that same smile she has always had. Full of such happiness, pride, and encouragement. -Thank you mom and dad for always being my faces in the crowd and my biggest supporters. I love y'all very much. Today, I am thankful for my friends, family, and that I have been so richly blessed! Today, I am thankful for errands.
I didn't have may errands to run today. Most included easy things like going to the store, or stopping by the library. Nothing to crazy with a side of mindless. I love errands because its just me, running around town, getting things done, spending time alone yet surrounded by so much and so many people. I control what I do, when I do it, and ultimately the attitude I have while running errands. That kind of "down town" is necessary. It allows me time to recharge and think about everything that is going on, all while taking care of business. Its the perfect combination of multi-tasking. So, though errands can be so daunting and annoying at times, I am glad I have the time I do when I run them. This post isn't about pools, bathing suits, or water.
Today, I am thanful for swimming. You've heard the expression: sink or swim. Generally something is thrown upon someone and either they succeed, or they fail. This afternoon, this exact scenario became my reality. I am currently in the middle of my leadership clinicals. The whole point of these clinicals is to eventually by the end of the rotation, have us take on a full patient load and "be the nurse". Luckily, I'm getting to do my leadership where I've been doing my Externship, which allowed me to be familiar with the hospital, protocols, and general overview of how things work. Also part of my Externship is to prepare me to "be the nurse" before I graduate and start working as an RN once I pass my NCLEX. Normally my preceptor lets me do a lot, and has taught me so much, but never really cut me lose to see what I was made of. To see if I would sink or swim. Today was that day. One of the patients we got from PACU was very unstable emotionally and physically. She required a lot of attention and my preceptor ended up spending almost five hours in this one patients room, along with at the most at one time five different nurses. She was pretty swamped and had no time for the other three patients. So here was it: my make it or break it moment. I was thrown into having to take care of these three other patients by myself (I mean there was an RN who kinda observed), but everything was my decision, time schedule, and critical thinking skills being put to the test for five hours. So how did I do? Let's just say I swam like I was born for the water. It felt so good to be so independent, but also confident in the care I was giving and providing. I wasn't a "shawdow" or "helper". I was "the nurse" for five hours and it was amazing. This little experience reminded me why I chose nursing and just the passion I have to learn and serve others. And that I will praise God because I am fearfully and wonderfully made! |